Invasion

Each day I struggle to find reason to continue

To find some shard of beauty within the ruins of my life

To find hidden in the destruction a reason to believe

All the while the vampires laugh and gloat

As they continue to covet

What they believe they have stolen from me

They revel in my devastation

Thrill at my ruin

Believing me destroyed

The sorrow will be theirs

When I rise again

And they are left with nothing

But the smoke and mirrors they used to try and deceive me

Into giving up my hopes and dreams for this life

They will never have that which is truly mine

Dreamed last night that I was going into this strange restaurant with my ex husband and my son. We pulled up in an old luxury car with pock marks marring all of the windows. My ex husband insisted on parking across from the restaurant by an old ware house although there was plenty of parking near the restaurant. I was so upset that I started to cry, because I was handicapped and needed to walk using these special motorized stilts--which to my amusement now looked to be a couple of Hokey floor sweepers.

In the restaurant, which looked like an Indian diner that had seen better days, we met with my late father. I needed to go to the bathroom so I left my purse with the others. When I came back, these two women were looking in my purse for a photograph. When I told them to get out of my purse, they acted as if I was the one in the wrong.

"Don't you ever go looking in anyone's purse again without their permission!" I scolded.

"Well, I don't know what the big deal is," one of them said. "It was right on top. Besides, at work we can all look in the nursing bag."

"I don't give a flying fuck what you can do at work!" I said angrily. "The nursing bag is public property. Any of the employees can use it. This is my god damn purse and I don't want you touching it!"

The two walked away whispering about what a crazy bitch I was. I didn't care. They were invading something that was mine.

I think this may represent the belief on the part of certain people that what is mine should also be theirs. 

What I've written and published belongs to anyone to read. And you can talk to whomever you want, whether that person be living in spirit, so long as that person is willing to talk to you. But attempting to usurp a special connection between two people, whether those people are living or in spirit is wrong. Attempting to destroy someone's inspiration out of jealousy is wrong. And belittling a person just because they're different is wrong. 

The vampires may have temporarily weakened me and may have invaded something very personal, but they cannot take from me that which is mine. And they cannot take my soul.

I will never be like you. I will never be one of you. And that is indeed a blessing.

(By vampires, I do not mean undead supernatural creatures. I am referring to psychic vampires--those individuals who drain energy from others. Those are plenty real.)